Always...

Yeah, that's what I thought I heard her say earlier. And that's when I stared at her confused. Again, she found it insulting in a way and so once more I was stuck with a head full of insults and bumps.

Pop was sleeping while I was here, awake and stuck sittin' up. I couldn't go to sleep after that beating or that cake of hers. I didn't know what was worse: laying down with a stomachache because of her cookies or not even being able to touch the pillow without complaining of being hit by a tomboy.

I sighed and put my head down while looking at my hands. My folded arms limped now. I was tired, but not tired enough to not feel the pain. Or not tired enough to think about nothing but Akane. Argh!

Frustrated, I got up and walked out of the room. I'm not getting any sleep, that's for sure.

"I think it's my turn to sit on the roof," I whispered quietly to myself.

As I stood there, I wondered where I would sit. I looked at the place where I found Akane a week ago. Then, I shook my head. Get out of my brain!

When I actually found a place to sit, I almost facefaulted. I found myself overlooking the pond...and over Akane's bedroom. Stupid, stupid, stupid me!

Why me? I always had to ask, why me?

My angry face, I felt, calmed down. And my eyes looked at all different things.

"She said, 'Always.'" I don't know. That look that nagged me the last time we were here nagged me again when I thought of her saying that. Everyone was talking and complimenting her but I could hear her, as clear as a pin dropping in an empty room. 'Always'.

I didn't understand it. Not at all.

Sure, she hit me in the next minute, but that's an Akane thing. That's what she does, and I understood that. We all did.

But...she cooked that cake for me. Used my mom's recipe, (well, half, but anyway) to make me that cake. She didn't have to, but she always did things like that.

Violent one second and then sweet in the next. I shook my head at that. "Always so confused..."

Didn't know how to please her in either way. One way or the other, it was always wrong.

But then, I looked at my hands and then I looked at the pond below. "But, she stuck it out with me."

When Kasumi first explained Akane's behavior to me, it didn't make any sense to me. How could someone be temperamental, sweet, and violent at the same time?! When Dr. Tofu said, "You'll understand soon enough." Heck, I didn't get it that time either. I still didn't know Akane well enough, then.

Now, I do.

Not really...Okay, okay. Somewhat.

But it didn't change anything. I was just more prepared. I just knew that one way or the other, every time I tried, it just wasn't ever enough. Then I would go and mess up the moment.

"Why me?" I hit my hand to my forehead.

When was the first time I said that? Whenever I got confused and frustrated, I would say, "Why me?"

I remember now, it was when I got the ability to change into a girl. I thought, now and in the future, it would always be a curse to me. Sure, the girl form would help me out once in a while, but in the long run, it caused me so much trouble.

Think it's easy changing genders and sometimes not even realizing it? No way! I'd give almost anything to be a 'whole man' again!

But over the years, it didn't matter so much. Not that I didn't want to turn back into a whole man again, but it didn't matter either way now. I was used to it. Sometimes, it was even 'convenient'.

In any case, at that moment that I changed in Jusenkyou, so many things rushed into my head. And the thing that stuck out the most was, "Can I ever (gulp) accept this?!"

"Why me?!!!!" I screamed while running away from Shampoo. I couldn't stay there living from heartbeat to heartbeat as she traced me all over China like some fugitive. And for what? Because I beat her when I wasn't supposed to. Then again, knowing me, I don't think I would have let her beat me. It was hard even doing that for Mousse.

The next time I thought "Why me?" was when I got out of the bath when Akane suddenly opened the door. I just knew that that girl would end up being my fiancée.

I couldn't see it in any other way. Nabiki kept on poking me in the chest when she thought I was really a girl; and I knew right there that when she found out the truth, it wouldn't work out. Somehow, I was kind of grateful. She'd end up exploiting me...as what happened that ONE time...

And Kasumi. No. She didn't like younger guys. Even if she did, I kept looking at her like she was an older sister. Until now I do. I had grown to love her that way... Kasumi's just being Kasumi. That's the best I can describe it.

Yeah, Kasumi's just too gentle. I knew I'd end up doing everything she asked and with a smile. And I don't want to even think of when she got mad...

So, it came to 'I'll drown him' girl. The tomboy Akane.

Sure, she screamed and she tried to kill me. Heck, she insulted me and I insulted her back. Even got my first beating from her.

"But this girl," I thought when I looked closely at her as she sat across the dinner table one night, "she never did what I most feared. She didn't- "

Before I could finish my thought, I got my usual hit on the head with her hammer. Where in the heck does she get that thing outta nowhere?! I'll never understand it!

Which led me to think the same question when I met Kunou. "What an idiot."

I thought changing in front of him was bad. But man, when I found out he was in love with my girl side, he just made me sick. At first, it was just pure shock. After the shocked feeling drained away, I felt nothing but disgust. "Why me?" I would complain.

To me (I can assume Kunou thinks the same way), he was such a bother! He always got in the way! I didn't know what was worse: him going for my girl side or his sister going for my boy side.

"His sister." I shuddered in fear. "I can handle Kunou just fine."

Then, it happened again. When Ryouga showed up one afternoon at my school. I couldn't understand how someone could be so pissed off with me and not tell me what the hell I did wrong.

When he did, I sulked a bit before I went to sleep that night.

"Ryouga's too sensitive for his own good." I now laid my back with my hands on my head while looking up at the cloudy sky.

But he's an okay guy. I'll never say it to his face though. He'd never let me live it down. Besides, he'd start crying and then I'll laugh because I couldn't help it. Then, he'll get upset and hit me and...you know where this is going.

Ryouga really was cool, though. We were rivals, but respected each other's space. But sometimes, it would go almost too far. It always came to one reason that would cause each of us to loathe the other: Akane is mine.

And then, we were friends too. Our relationship always puzzled me, but thinking too much about it would give me a headache. Just like mine with Akane.

One thing stood out in the end: We looked out for each other. Whether we grit each other's teeth in hate or saved each other from some sort of danger, it still came back to 'I hate that jerk but he better be alive because I want to be the one to kick his butt."

I laughed at that. "How stupid. But that's the way we are."

Sigh. He was so bad off; and me, turning into a girl. How come we're so pathetic?

Just when I think things have gotten a bit better, the question I asked myself already four times came to haunt me.

It was when Shampoo came for my blood...and found me.

I have a fear of cats, but if there was anything that came close to that, it was just being with her in the same country. How'd she ever find me and in Japan, I will never know. And I a'int askin' either. She's just too smart for her own good, if you ask me.

It doesn't help with her great grandmother around either. She helps me, but then she tricks me at the same time. And that same trait rubbed off on Shampoo.

Now, Shampoo, the girl I had feared with every bone in my body, was all right now to me. The 'date thing' I still don't wanna do, but hey, beggars can't be choosers. ;_; All too often happening to me.

I don't hate her or nothin'. She's just too pushy. I try to be nice pushin' her away, but she just doesn't give up. And then, there's me. I hate making any one (except my pop and Happosai) cry, on purpose that is. That don't count for the insults I throw at Akane. I don't mean anything by them.

With Shampoo came Mousse right behind her. For a moment, yes, I did feel threatened by him. If he had done anything to Akane, I know he wouldn't be breathing right now...

Well, anyway, Mousse. Akane and I thought we could get Shampoo and him to date with that fight. But, it didn't.

When Shampoo picked him up in his duck form, the only thing I learned that day was how much a guy can give up his pride and life because he loved a girl. I couldn't understand him. Sure he'd save Shampoo and I would save Akane, but to give up your pride...I dunno.

I guess that was what made us different. For him, it was okay. He was used to that type of treatment. Shampoo came from an Amazon tribe and believe me, I should know better than anyone what was the meaning behind the 'Kiss of Death' because of beaten pride. As for Akane, we were both stubborn.

Besides, it reminds of the time I lost my strength. I lost my pride too...and Akane? She couldn't even think of another reason for staying in Nerima. But she wanted to come with me if I did go away...

"Ukyou..." When Ukyou came after me, I was confused. Very confused. Here was yet another person ticked off with me and wouldn't tell me the reason and thought I knew already.

"Why me?" I had whispered to myself when she started to really hurt me while we were battling. "He" was my friend. And I felt betrayed.

But after things straightened out, we were okay again. We were best friends. I could actually talk to her. And, that's just it.

"I still see her as a guy. She's my friend." And...I felt just that way about her.

"Akane." I sighed and then I smiled.

My thoughts always seemed to come back to you. I guess it's because I am more calm. Everything seemed clearer when things weren't poundin' in and on my head.

Sure, I complain about you all the time, Akane. Yes, I know that I'm not the greatest on compliments, and so you think that I'm not sincere. Then, there's how I go on and on about myself.

Sheesh. I got up suddenly. "That's why she's mad at me. Well duh. I knew that."

I like her and everything, but I know nothing about love. Let alone girls or social skills for that matter... But there was just something that Akane had over me.

Akane could never understand how many people liked her. Neither could I...at first. Now, I think I'm beginning to.

I brought out the necklace Kasumi had given to me.

That girl kissed me. And I didn't even notice it until I found my head back on my shoulders after she did it. But she was happy. First time she was pleased with me...

She...well, she was..."Why can't I ever get my thoughts straight?"

Then, a clear thought flashed in my mind, "The best thing about Akane was just about her being there...I guess I'm trying to say that I need you..."

I blushed for a moment. "What the heck am I thinking?!"

"Yeah, what are you thinking about Ranma?"

I looked behind me as soon as she whispered to me. "Akane..."

She smiled. Wow, she was in a better mood than usual. Then again, her cooking actually improved...

There she was coming over to me.

Slip.

As she came to sit next to me, I now found her on top of me. Because I had reached out to catch her, we were now in this uncomfortable position unable to move either.

"As clumsy as ever, Akane," I commented.

"Shut up," she snapped. "This wouldn't have happened if you had gone to sleep."

"And whose fault was that? All the bumps on my head wouldn't let me."

I couldn't even see her face.

"It's your fault."

"It's always my fault, right Akane?" I wondered for a plan on what to do. How would we get out of this?

"Yes, it is." Unsteadily, she pushed the hair out of my face with one hand.

We finally looked at each other eye to eye. I was so busy looking at her that I didn't notice that my temperature was rising. This was the first time that I had been so close to you-

"Well, we can't stay like this forever. I'm leaving!"

So, she started to get up.

"You dummy! I was thinking of a way!" I shouted.

Slip!

There we were slipping off the roof and I hugged her as we were falling down. There's nothing that I can grab or use! Argh!

Thump!

Akane and I were wide-eyed to find each other kissing one another!

We both pushed each other away instantly.

"Aaah!" She slapped me.

"Well, it wasn't so great for me either!"

She gave me an evil look. "Baka!!!"

As Akane stomped away and the rest of the family was trying to find out what happened. We both shouted at the same time, "Nothing!"

And she went back to her room while I just sat there leaning on the door of the den. Then, I looked out at the koi pond.

I leaned and touched my lips. We actually kissed...I can't believe I even kissed her!

But, I chuckled a bit. I knew that look all too well, I knew her mouth would be running a million miles per minute later this morning, I also knew that she wasn't really mad at me...

I know you too well by now.

Maybe it's just like you know I can never say I love you because I never said it before. But I tried to show it the best that I could.

I acted like a jerk. Yes, I knew that already. And I knew I wasn't the easiest person to deal with. I tried to hide my fears and weaknesses deep inside and show confidence outside with my strength

But you didn't care about that Akane. You always tried your best to help me. Always.

Of all the things I was insecure about and feared the most,

It didn't bother you.

You didn't care about my curse, Akane...

You actually liked me the way I am...

Now, I knew why she made me think and I felt guilty about making her upset, even seeing her cry.

All those times I didn't understand why I didn't want to disappoint you,

when I didn't understand what Kasumi or Dr. Tofu told me about you,

it kinda made sense now.

 

If you really got mad and didn't care about me anymore, Akane...

 

As my eyes were sleepily falling, I thought I heard footsteps. The soft thumping sounds stopped and I felt a soft, warm blanket put over me as I sneezed.

 

Before I fell asleep on the doorway, all I could think was,

"I never act like it, but things as they are...

 

She brushed my pigtail softly away and

I then felt her head on my shoulder.

 

...I want them to stay like this."

After meeting you Akane,

the worst thing that I feared the most now was...

...the very moment you would leave me.

 

--

Author's note: ;_; And here is the last chapter of my fanfic. ^_^ I hope you enjoyed it.

Yes, I know Ranma is totally ooc. I'm a little disappointed in that, but if I wanted to see more of what he thought, I had to take out the tension. I had to make a scene where he could actually think of things clearly. So, his mood would also be a little changed. But after seeing more of the anime and specific parts, well, I'm NOT disappointed anymore because now, his character in here isn't so ooc as I thought...

I wanted his thoughts to be much stronger and silent than Ryouga's and Akane's...

It took me several hours to just make the draft alone to achieve the feel and the feat. But I'm proud of it.

Sure, you may be expecting another long explanation, but naw, I'm not giving one. I'm just going to say that I loved making this very much. I didn't know what to do at first, but I'm glad it worked out for the best. And I had fulfilled what I had set out to do: Look at each of the character's psyche.

I wanted to do something different, and I'm glad I did. I looked deeper than what was portrayed, so that accounts for the "ooc parts". But overall, I think it's pretty accurate...Of course, that is only my opinion.

I hope I had been able to piece everything and everyone from how they related to Ranma and how Ranma related to them = my goal. ^^;;;

Hmm, what else to say? Thanks for reading! * bows humbly *